Super Mario 64 Deserves An M Rating

I recently played Super Mario 64 DS and found all kinds of things wrong with this game which are not reflected in the ratings.

First of all, there is the issue of violence in the game. I do not mind punching and throwing things at enemies, but isn't brutally crushing enemies under your own body weight pushing it a bit? When I was younger a kid I knew actually tried that while playing in the back yard and almost ended up breaking a friend's ribs. And what kind of sadistic person gets pleasure out of squishing animals with their own bodies anyway?

And then the physics do not seem to match up either. Not many kids can hold their breath for two minutes underwater, and in the game you always survive falling off a structure or building if you land on your butt at the last minute. Kids can be impressionable and convinced into thinking they can do these things in real life.

And then there is the subject of racism. In the first level the black bob ombs are evil and enjoy violence while the pink bob ombs are peace loving and helpful. This can be interpreted as a biased and racial metaphor for black and white people. And is it just me or don't the brown skinned goombas, who are made to be the most pathetic enemies in the game, seem to look like the head of a bald cartoon drawing of a black man with feet? Most characters are white skinned italian stereotypes, jumping on black peoples heads. If this is not racism then I do not know what is.

I do not play video games but I am entitled to my opinion, and I think Jack Thompson is right. All games with this degree of violence and racism should be banned.

This article is a satire, and is not meant to be taken seriously. I hope you get a chuckle out of it.

are you trying to say Super Mario 64 DS should receive M like a Resident Evil game? :rolleyes:

Pink is technically not a human group type as there are no racism. The black bomb-oms ae evil because

1)Thats the normal color of a bomb
2)Thats how bomb-ombs color has been for years
3)Dark is the color of night, in which bad things happen. People can't see in the dark, so people can get away with crimes in the dark. And what do you see in the pitch-black of night?

How on earth can you compare a goomba to a human? They have vicious fangs and twisted eyes. They look like mushrooms. I have yet to see an African or any human for that matter that looks like such.

I have a comment to add but it is surley both racist and offensive. Maybe it's the suggestions of Super Mario 64?
Has anyone ever played Contact? If a game ever deserved an M rating it was this. On the second island there is some kids running around inside a building, you can beat them to death with an assortment of weapons. Whats worse is the Professors quote for when you engage them in battle "This shoudn't take long....". Well the quotes probably not that bad but it does make me chuckle.

Omg!!! It's Tack Jhompson! Everybody Run!

Now THAT was a good satire! It made me "chuckle". :)
You should put at the bottom "I've come up with all this with no research what so ever". If you actually believed all that, this is what I'd say...

NOTE, this is a joke!

Jack Thompson isn't right. He doesn't care about kids. He only cares about money and power. He gives humanity (and Christians) a bad name.

Mario squashing a Goomba shouldn't count as violence. There's no blood, it's cartoonish, it isn't similar to anything you'd encounter in real life. Also, the fact that you actually tried jumping on your friend because you thought it would act similar to the game makes you a retard. I'm sure you just tried that five minutes ago.

I wouldn't be dumb enough to believe you could jump off a building or survive under water for five minutes (I can hold my breath for three minutes) and live just because I saw it in a game. People start playing "video games" at about five. They would already know common dangers by now, and even if they didn't, they still have their parents to keep them in line.

And the Bomb Omb thing is like the Jinx controversy on Pokemon. People (especially Christian groups) think they need to run the world, get a bunch of attention (by people shaking their heads) and to disprove anything they think promotes another religion (or the devil). This is an example of one of those things.

And the fact you haven't played the game sticks out like a sore thumb. You can't comment on something if you haven't tried it. Would you accuse Lasagna of being disgusting if you haven't tried it, or accusing it of promoting violence because it's the color of blood? No!

Wow.

I just about had a heart attack until I got to the bottom...

Wow.

gg aryn, +rep to you!

youre lucky that was a joke, or else everyone else wouldve pulled out their flamethrowers

for a sec i thought we found another jack thompson worshipper... now THAT wouldve been bad.

Even if it wasn't a satire I would have LMAO'd 'cause it's sooo ridiculas. There are quite a few ratings that catch me off guard though.

um i hope you are joking....

i hope ure joking...

Didn't see that. Yes, +REP Aryn, you had me going there :)